I'm back like I forgot somethin'

I heard that line in a song once - I thought it was pretty clever so I used it.  Let me apologize for my absence brethren.  I was fervently campaigning for the prophet job.  Now some of you may have heard that Warren named his brother (not Chuy, but the other one) as his successor.  HEAVENLY FATHER has asked me to tell you that he and Warren aren't speaking anymore as it is very difficult to get messages into prison even if you are a divine being.  HEAVENLY FATHER has given me his support for the prophet job and I have many devoted followers.  A good brother in HEAVENLY FATHER named Mike or something (Lucifer is besieging my internet connection so it would take forever to click the link right now) has turned from his pagan ways and become a devoted FLDS high priest.  Yea, he will certainly be a god one day and have a really fast plane.  This brother has offered to personally murder any blogger I dislike.  The spirit of HEAVENLY FATHER is strong in this one.  And for every right hand man (Captain Mike), there is a left hand man.  I'm talking to you Elder Younger, shape up boy or you'll loose one of your wives to Chuy.  With this support I officially declare myself spiritual leader of the FLDS church.  May HEAVENLY FATHER bless us all, most notably myself and Sky Captain over there, and to a much lesser degree, Elder Younger.